I found out that my dad cheated on my mother and I can’t get over it. Please Advice

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I found out that my dad cheated on my mother and I can’t get over it

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I feel so angry with my dad for keeping this from me and my two younger sisters

Dear Coleen

I’m a 34-year-old man and I recently discovered that I have another brother and sister. To put it politely, my dad has always had an eye for the ladies and he fathered these children when he was still married to my mum (they got divorced 10 years ago).

I’ve always known he was a flirt and I remember huge arguments at home between him and mum after they’d been to a party, but I never knew until now that he’d had other children.

He wouldn’t have told me – I found out at a family do after one of my aunts, who’d had too much to drink, spilled the beans. I don’t even know if my mum knows.

I feel so angry with my dad for keeping this from me and my two younger sisters. Our half-brother and sister have different mums and are grown up with kids of their own.

I don’t know what to do with this information, but I feel I need to talk to someone about it. Should I talk to my mum and tell my sisters?

I haven’t spoken to my dad since I found out – I’m so angry with him I’m worried I’ll say something I’ll regret.

What’s your advice?

Coleen says

I think you should speak to your dad first and find out exactly who does know. Your mum might know and it may be part of the reason your parents’ marriage broke up.

And if she does know, you can’t be angry with her because she probably made a decision not to tell you because she didn’t want to cause you any pain or confusion.

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